Journal Of Stories & Aesthetics.

Interviews. Editorials. Articles. Conversations. Things. Events.

Sowing and reaping in relationships

When I was a much younger woman. I was told that biologically, women were built to be receivers and men givers.

Put aside for just a moment ‘the sista hood’ and feminism and catch this. “How?” I asked rolling my eyes, thinking that he was talking about the ‘obvious’ sexual anatomy. But this particular man replied. “I learnt long ago that if you give a woman the ingredients she will make you a meal, if you give her a house she will make a home. If you give a woman the seed she will make the baby, and if you give her trouble she will give you hell ”. I remembered laughing at that moment and it had dawned on me that the man was talking truth. Even though that conversation happened many years ago I still agree.

You don’t plant apple trees to pick oranges!

The world has changed for women throughout the decades. Gone are the days where we wait for a man to provide the flour so we can bake him a loaf, especially when there is a Tesco Metro on every corner of the high street. However, the one thing we women can honestly agree on is having a great relationship is still fundamental. Be it love or friendship. I have tried for many years to teach my husband this single principle of giving and receiving. I would say, “Michael, I don’t get up in the morning and decide to be nasty to you! Don’t you ever think that you could have triggered this?” He grunts a confident “No”. So I proceed by suggesting that he has married a mad women. Ironically he has grasped the fact that I perk up and show him a lot of gratitude when he surprises me with a romantic dinner date or just simply doing the hoovering. Yes I can only really comment on my own experiences but I truly believe that whatever seed you sow is the harvest you reap. You don’t plant apple trees to pick oranges!

Give your loved one a hug and watch them smile.

A male friend once confided in me that he did not understand why his girlfriend was acting so irrationally (not the phrase he used). After some ranting he eventually said that she felt he did not show her any love. Now my friend is one of the most funniest people on the planet. But even I have to admit ‘showing the love’ is not his strong point. He treated her like she was one of the boys. So when the girlfriend started talking and acting as so he struggled to see why. Suffice to say that relationship is no more and the last I heard she eventually found someone new and is married with a baby. My friend on the other hand is single.

I say give your loved one a hug and watch them smile. As for me I’ve got my eye on a lovely pair of black patent shoes so Michael is in for that back massage tonight ;)

 

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